Monday, July 22, 2013

Kids, Your Old Man Really Is an Old Man

I'm celebrating a milestone birthday today — one that officially ushers me into middle age.

It's hard to believe, but I've now been a speck on this blue-green pebble for four decades. I've outlived pretty much all the fallen rappers of my time, and my demographic is of little interest to advertisers.

Just yesterday, Google AdSense sent me a link recommending I upgrade to a BlackBerry Bold (a model that's four years old). I guess they've seen my profile and figure I won't know the difference.


When I talk to my kids about my childhood, I sound positively ancient.

I was telling Elliot yesterday about how you could still smoke in airplanes when I was his age. (Not that I was old enough to smoke at the time.)


"Why did they do that, Daddy?"
"I don't know, son. People had different ideas about things back then."

(See, that's something an old person says.)

When I was his age, we didn't have cable television or even color TV (we got our first color set in 1980). Personal computers came later, and I didn't start using the Internet until college. Our phone had a rotary dial and hung on the wall.

I also lived on an unpaved road in a log cabin heated by a wood-burning stove. But in fairness, that was due to some odd lifestyle choices made by my parents in the late-'60s.

Anyway, milestones are arbitrary and I really don't feel all that different today than I did yesterday. I also think about what I have now: a wife and three kids, a job I love, and an exciting life in one of the greatest cities on Earth (when it's not 100 degrees out, at least).

Plus, a color television.