Sunday, November 30, 2008

BuboBlog Reviews 'Role Models'

Kelly's mom watched Elliot one night last week, letting us go out to the movies for the first time since he was born. We decided to see "Role Models," since I'd heard mixed things about "Quantum of Solace."

The funny thing is, when the movie started, I looked over and saw a couple sitting next to us — WITH A BABY! Life is unfair.

The movie itself was very funny. Maybe not quite as good as Judd Apatow's best (he's not affiliated with the film, even though it stars some of his mainstays: Paul Rudd, Jane Lynch, Elizabeth Banks, etc.), but definitely one of the best comedies I've seen this year. Some very spicy language too (perfect for babies!).

BuboBlog rating: 3.5 asterisks (out of four).


Campaign season is still in full swing in Georgia. They have a run-off Senate election coming up, and it may determine whether the Democrats have a filibuster-proof majority.

Anyway, we saw a ton of ads for the incumbent, Saxby Chambliss, including one where his grandchildren exhort Georgians to vote for their "big daddy."

Now, either that's a Southern expression for grandfather, or something is seriously wrong with the Chambliss family!

Sign of the Times?

The economy must be bad, because it looks like there have been some major cutbacks at Borders.

I can just imagine going in there:
"Excuse me, do you have the latest Nickelback album?"
"Sorry, no. We don't carry CDs anymore."
"Oh, that's too bad. Wait, what happened to your books?"
"We only carry one book now. It's by Dean Koontz."
"Uh, no thanks."

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

I Got Gas

Check out the price of petrol here in Atlanta.

Might be a little too late for it to save GM, though...

Happy Thanksgiving from BuboBlog

Atlanta where da booty baby at, y'all.

I'm writing this from Georgia, after taking Elliot on his first airplane flight. Surprisingly, he was very well behaved. In fact, there was another baby on our aisle making all the racket. What terrible parents!

Also surprising: Getting through security is actually quicker with a baby because they let you cut the line. Nice! I would have had kids years ago if I had known. (I do think it's odd that once you're on the plane, they make sure you're in your seatbelt, but pay no attention to the baby. If we had hit turbulence, there would have been an infant-shaped missile flying around the cabin.)

Despite being a native Californian, Elliot seems to have adapted to Atlanta fairly well. He's back to his usual routine of eating, sleeping and pooing his pants. Yay, Elliot!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

'Elliot and Dad Home Alone'

Hopefully this is less disturbing than "Sleep Sheep" — especially since Kelly made me take down the version with explicit lyrics.

It tells the tale of an infant and his father left to their own devices.

Item: Valencia Street Has Hipsters!

The Chronicle ran a column today about how Valencia Street in San Francisco's Mission district is now a favorite of "hipsters": "They settled on Valencia Street a couple of years ago and took it over."

Okay, so this occurred around 2006 then? Funny, because I feel like this was already the case when I first moved to San 1996.

And in fact, the columnist could have learned about the coolness of Valencia if he were just reading BuboBlog! Remember this post:
It wasn't our intention to spend the whole day on Valencia, but who knew you could do so much on that one street!

For instance:
—Drinking at a biker bar
—Drinking at an Irish bar
—Drinking at a Mexican bar
—Drinking at some bar that gave us free Goldfish crackers

We also visited a pirate supply store, one of my favorite used-book stores and — best of all — a place with a trough urinal.

Oddly enough, the Chronicle column never once mentions trough urinals. Talk about missing the story!

BuboBlog Remains on the Cutting Edge

I now have one of those newfangled YouTube pages, where you can see my videos in place.

Apparently my last film, "Sleep Sheep," disturbed some people. I guess I could try to make Elliot's next video more of a feel-good movie, though I'm concerned about compromising my artistic integrity.

Friday, November 21, 2008

A Jewish-Sounding Name?

Tonight I went to an event for work at a sushi bar. A guy there was asking about my son and what his name was, so I told him. This is the resulting conversation:

"So I imagine there's a bris in your future?"

"Yeah, totally. Wait, what?"

"You know, a bris."

"You mean you think we're Jewish? Why, because he's named Elliot?"

"Sure, and also because of his last name."

" that a Jewish name?"


"That's odd. What about Ike and Tina?"

"Those are stage names."

"I'm not sure I've ever met anyone Jewish named that."

"Trust me. I lived in New York for 10 years. It's totally a Jewish name."

I let the subject drop at that point. I mean, I'm fine with Elliot being mistaken for a member of the Tribe, and I can see how his first name might sound a little Jew-y, since it's a variant of Old-Testament Jew Elijah. But it's also a clan name in Scotland, which is pretty Jew-deprived.

And as for our last name sounding Jewish? Well, that's definitely new to me.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

My Photo Featured on Freakonomics Site

Remember when I snapped a picture of that Body Shop ad, the one that bragged about how they pay Italian workers fair wages?

Well, I sent the photo to the Freakonomics blog and they devoted an entry to it. Check it out.

Little did I know that I would be taken to task in the comments section.

A sampling:
—Unfortunately, [he] is naive.
—[He] seems to have a perception about everyone living and working Italy that a lot of people outside the US have about everyone living in the US — that we all drive big cars and live in big houses and that no one is being taken advantage of.

This comment seems unfair, since I took the photo at a bus shelter while waiting for a bus. But yes, the perception that Italians drive big cars is quite pervasive!

A Chuman-Neanderthal, you say? Sign me up!

Talk about a two-for-one! According to the New York Times, it may be possible for scientists to bring a Neanderthal back to life — by splicing its DNA with that of a modern-day chimp. (They would use Neanderthal hair to get the genetic material.) However, the whole thing might present "several ethical issues," according to the Times.

Whatever. Let's get this done. I will devote all of BuboBlog's advertising revenue to the cause.

Almost as awesome: Scientists say they can bring back a woolly mammoth. All they need is $10 million.

It's amazing to me that our nation's so-called "philanthropists" can't make this happen. I mean, $10 million? That's nothing.

If I ever become a man of means, my two first actions will be:
(a) Fund the chuman-Neanderthal/woolly mammoth project.
(b) Finish the Crazy Horse Memorial. They need to speed that up because that thing is going to be AWESOME.

The Tell-Tale Sheep

Kelly purchased a terrifying stuffed animal for Elliot that sits in his crib and makes a beating-heart sound. It's called Sleep Sheep.

Watch if you dare!

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Seriously...a third BuboBlog?

I've complained before about the knockoff French site that's also called BuboBlog. (It was started in 2006 — more than two years after mine.)

Apparently the lawyers at BuboBlog Enterprises LLC are doing a terrible job protecting our intellectual property, because now there is a THIRD BuboBlog. (This is what happens when you only pay your staff a portion of your advertising revenue.)

With this new BuboBlog, I can't even discern what language it's printed in (Esperanto?). I do like that it has a banner saying "BLOG!" in the corner.

Here's a sample post:
Még nem láttam... új James Bond-filmet, de a Casino Royale jó volt. Pörgős, fasza, tuti. Kár, hogy az a laza és megfellebezhetetlen bondos elegancia hiányzott. Valamit valahol elbasztak. Állítólag a legújabb részben is. Roger Moore és Pierce Brosnan után tulajdonképpen egy Terminátort teremtettek. Ehhh, hiányzik James. Megnézem ezt is, de be vagyok szarva, hogy elkúrták. Nem kicsit, nagyon.

Okay, I've managed to get this translated.

It says:
My blog is a sad pretender to the majesty exhibited by the U.S. version of BuboBlog (the original and best!). Let's just say that if the real BuboBlog were a James Bond film, it would be something kick-ass like Casino Royale. My blog, on the other hand, would be Roger Moore in Octopussy. Except I didn't even come up with a cool name like Octopussy — I just stole my name from BuboBlog. It's a wonder I even find the will to live.

I feel that Dr. Dre best sums up my feelings on the issue.

Pot Clubs Vs. Starbucks: I Started This!

Remember back in 2005 when I first suggested that pot clubs may eventually outnumber Starbucks locations in San Francisco? If not, you can view all my posts on the topic by clicking here.

Well, apparently the Office of National Drug Control Policy made the same comparison on its blog. And does BuboBlog get credit for the idea? No.

As Steve Jobs would say, "YOU'RE STEALING FROM US!"

Anyway, the blog suggests that there are actually already more pot clubs than Starbucks. But according to this, that may not be quite right.

I feel that Dr. Dre best sums up my feelings on the issue.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Bill O'Reilly's San Francisco

Bill O'Reilly sent a TV crew to San Francisco to find evidence that the city is decaying under liberal leadership.

The whole clip, which you can view here, consists of interviews with pot smokers, homeless people and transgender prostitutes — along with shots of strip clubs.

I want to say for the record that this video TOTALLY misrepresents San Francisco and its people.

It is, however, an entirely accurate portrayal of my neighborhood.

Friday, November 14, 2008

Body Shop Disses Italy

Maybe Sarah Palin didn't know Africa was a continent, but the Body Shop thinks Italy is a third-world country.

While waiting for the bus, I noticed this ad for some kind of Body Shop balm. It says:
" also contains Community Trade organic bergamot from Italy. This means we aim to ensure the people who farm it are paid fairly and they, in turn, provide us with quality ingredients."

That's great and all, but don't we usually apply fair-trade programs to impoverished workers in the developing world. If I were Italian, I would be like, "Oh no, you didn't!" And Body Shop would all like, "Ah, snap!"

Actually, wait, I've ridden the subway in Rome...Body Shop may have a point.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Go Bears

I think it's cool that the proposed California bullet train (which got funding in the election last week) is going to be painted in Berkeley colors.

But I wonder how they managed to get this past Southern California voters!

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

I Think It's Obvious...

...this guy has no idea how to play rochambeau!

Man Allegedly Attacks Wife with Scissors, Rock

A man allegedly stabbed his wife with a pair of scissors before hitting her in the head with a rock.

The 24-year-old Alice Springs man and his wife were walking near Todd River on Friday evening when he allegedly stabbed her in the back with the scissors then hit her several times on the head with a rock, police said.

The man was charged with aggravated assault, being armed with an offensive weapon and breaching a domestic violence order.

He will appear in Alice Springs Magistrates Court later today.

There was no report on the woman's condition in hospital.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Bravo, Sir...Bravo

I came across this video today. That ghastly wraith in the backseat is apparently Michael Jackson. The person in the front is movie director Brett Ratner (why are they hanging out together — who knows?).

I didn't think it was possible, but they've managed to sully the music of R. Kelly. Now it just feels cheap and dirty.

For shame.

Subway Restaurant — Idea Stealer!

Remember when I pitched my idea for a sandwich called the Pizzuna Melt?

Well, now Subway has a sandwich that is suspiciously similar — the Chicken Pizzaiola (pictured).

True, mine was built around tuna and theirs uses chicken, but still...

I think I may at least be able to file one of those nuisance lawsuits. I'm willing to give my attorney a cut of BuboBlog's ad revenues.

Saturday, November 08, 2008

All Elliot All The Time: Month Two

Elliot reached the two-month mark this week — on election day, actually.

Kelly documented his progress with a new slideshow.

I'm absent from a lot of the photos since I'm off working to put clothes on his back. (I'm going to ignore the fact that all of Elliot's clothes were given to us.)

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Dancing Machine

Remember when I tried to record Elliot dancing, but instead captured him making sick on himself?

Well, here is the video you've been waiting for. All rhythm, no vomit!

An Omen?

Tonight as I walked home from the subway, the clouds parted and there was a clear view of a crescent moon and star (Venus, maybe). It looked like this:

Kind of eerie to see this on the eve of the election. Maybe Obama really is a Muslim. (Not that there's anything wrong with that.)

Saturday, November 01, 2008

Welcome to the Jungle

I told you you hadn't seen the last of the cow costume!

For Halloween, we recreated a scene from Upton Sinclair's "The Jungle," with me as the turn-of-the-century meatpacker and Elliot as the unwitting steer.

I don't understand why he's crying.