Friday, December 28, 2007

Nice!

I was excited to see that I have my own personal bathroom at the San Francisco Centre movie theater.

BuboBlog Analysis!

The end of "Atonement" got me thinking, this is really the year of the Non-Hollywood Movie Ending. I mean, in addition to "Atonement," there's "Charlie Wilson's War," "No Country for Old Men," "The Mist," "The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford" (that also might win for Non-Hollywood Movie Title)...I'm sure there are others I'm forgetting.

It seems like endings are either post-modern or just plain bleak. Oh, and let's not overlook the "Sopranos" series finale.

Hopefully in 2008, we'll get back to the formula: (a) shit blows up (b) bad guy dies (c) good guy gets with hot lady.

BuboBlog Reviews 'Atonement'

We went to see "Atonement" tonight. Good movie, I'd say, though I'm not sure I'd have liked it if I hadn't read the book. I imagine it would be pretty boring and then once the "twist ending" comes, you'd feel a bit cheated. (One woman walked out of the theater after the ending was revealed. Kelly thinks she just had to go to the bathroom, but I imagine her saying, "That's bulls**t!")

The thing is, I'd say it was about as well adapted to the screen as such a story could be. I like the director, Joe Wright, as you know from my review in 2005 of "Pride & Prejudice" (a review that critics said was excessively gay).

I was wondering if they were going to avoid using the "c-word" in the movie version, you know, to dial it down for mainstream audiences. Heck no. In fact, I think they use it even more often — and I'm pretty sure I've never seen that word projected on screen that big before.

*SPOILER ALERT* It also occurred to me that this movie could enter the pantheon of films ("Sixth Sense," "The Others," "Vanilla Sky") where the main character(s) are actually dead for a good portion of the movie without the audience realizing it. I was pretty sure they'd never be able to use that twist again on screen, but there you go.

Anyway, I give it: *** (out of 4).

Final thought: How long before they produce the inevitable porn version, "Abonement."

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Well, At Least Now I Know

This handy Web site tells you how many five-year-olds you could handle in a fight. Sadly, I would only be able to beat up 19 five-year-olds.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Haverford in the News

Apparently Haverford is going to dispense with loans and just give students grants instead. Sweet!

I was reading the Philadelphia Inquirer story about this, and it seems unfortunate that they chose to refer to Haverford as "far less endowed" than other colleges.* The Inquirer must be doing some amazing investigative reporting these days...if you know what I mean.


* Thanks to BuboBlog correspondent Jon for noting this.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

White Christmas?

A fire started this morning a couple blocks from our place. No one was hurt, but they were still working on putting it out when I walked home tonight.

When I came upon the scene, I thought maybe it had snowed in one tiny spot of San Francisco. However, I think it was just the foam the firefighters used. Who knew they used so much!

I was tempted to do some snow angels, but the stuff smelled a little funny and I started to get woozy.

(As always, the scene is captured in perfect clarity by my cellphone camera.)

Sunday, December 09, 2007

CSI: Bubble Lounge

Last night we went to a friend's birthday party at a champagne bar/nightclub called the Bubble Lounge.

The DJ was playing some pretty cool tunes (mostly hip-hop), so a group of us went out onto the dance floor. The dance area is in the basement of the club -- in a low-ceilinged, cavernous room -- so it started to feel a little claustrophobic as the dance floor filled up.

Then, something weird happened. The room filled with a terrible smell -- like rotten eggs. I looked down and saw this plastic thing on the ground, which turned out to be a stink bomb. Apparently someone had thrown it on the floor to create mischief.

What's funny is, I'd always heard of stink bombs but never actually seen one in action. Stink bombs were just one of those things that I'd read about and had to take on faith that really existed (like a sextant or opium). It seems odd that I would be 34 years old at a trendy nightclub before experiencing a real stink bomb.

Suffice to say, the stink bomb was not da bomb -- at least when it came to promoting dancing. People cleared off the floor, and the club's staff appeared with flashlights to investigate.

Kelly, not possessing a sense of smell, was able to lead the men to the ruptured bomb without any discomfort on her part. It made me think that she might have a promising career in waste management.

I'm not sure if they ever caught the perpetrator, so you just have to wonder who would do that. A rival of the DJ who wanted to interrupt his crazy dope rhythms? Or maybe a guy who saw his lady cozying up with another fellow on the dance floor? Of course, there would have to be malice aforethought because who brings a stink bomb to a club?

Actually, maybe if others settled their nightclub disputes like this, there would be a lot less shooting. I suspect the rapper Shyne would not be in jail right now if he had just thrown a stink bomb to protect P. Diddy at that club in New York.

Saturday, December 08, 2007

Haverford Woman Gets 'Lucky'

Apparently the magazine Lucky does a feature on "real-life" people each month and talks about their favorite outfits. Well, according to an expose on the blog Jezebel, this month's person didn't really pick the outfit she wore or say the stuff she was quoted as saying.

This is all relevant to BuboBlog because the girl is a Haverford alum.

Even if the magazine tweaked her quotes, she does sound pretty fabulous. From the Jezebel blog:
Witness Courtney Childs Lewis. She's 25 and yet has three names already; she's consultant at Avenue A Razorfish and Haverford Alum who regularly travels to Paris on business, and yet if you ran into her in Paris you'd totally think you saw Gemma Ward. And don't get me started on all the excessively trendy/unflattering clothing choices only a hideously beautiful 25-year-old on a raw food and coke diet can pull off that she tries to foist upon the hapless Lucky-buying masses: shiny pointy ankle boots, those weird tuxedo pants, chic-formless jacket over chic-formless shirt accented by chic neckscarf....

I don't really know what a lot of that stuff meant or who Gemma Ward is, but she seems pretty cool.

However, Courtney has a blog, in which she distanced herself from the Lucky article:
This is not my “foolproof” outfit nor did any of those words exit my mouth ;)

Nice to see emoticons are still popular among today's youth.

Haverford also apparently loosened up its rule about not accepting any good-looking people. Why wasn't I alerted to this in the alumni magazine?

Thursday, December 06, 2007

Walk the Walk

The Brookings Institution released a study of the most walkable cities in the U.S.

San Francisco was No. 3, after Washington and Boston.

I definitely agree with Boston being one of the most walkable cities in the U.S., but Washington? Really? My feeling of Washington (pictured) is that it's a sprawling city, with a few walkable areas, but it's certainly not easy to walk from one part to another -- not without hopping on the Metro.

Well, it turns out they didn't really measure how walkable cities were as a whole. They looked at how many walkable areas were in each metro area and then measured how many of these areas there were per capita. They also didn't factor in how big each individual walkable area was.

That makes no sense. If I live in a town of 10,000 people, with one small walkable downtown area surrounded by strip malls and housing developments, would that mean I'm in a more walker-friendly area than a city of 100,000 with eight walkable neighborhoods stitched together? No, that's stupid.

And so, the Brookings Institution study is stupid. No offense D.C., but you are not more walkable than Boston or S.F. -- and certainly not New York (which ranked No. 10, just above San Diego and Los Angeles).

Heck, even Atlanta ranked No. 14, which the Journal-Constitution crows about in this article. That's not a good sign.

Here's the whole list:

1. Washington

2. Boston

3. San Francisco

4. Denver

5. Portland

6. Seattle

7. Chicago

8. Miami

9. Pittsburgh

10. New York

11. San Diego

12. Los Angeles

13. Philadelphia

14. Atlanta

15. Baltimore

16. St. Louis

17. Minneapolis

18. Detroit

19. Columbus

20. Las Vegas

21. Houston

22. San Antonio

23. Kansas City

24. Orlando

25. Dallas

26. Phoenix

27. Sacramento

28. Cincinnati

29. Cleveland

30. Tampa

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

See If You Can Spot the Unicorn

Apparently Debra Lafave, the former middle-school teacher who had sex with a student, has been arrested again for violating her probation.

My only comment on this case: That is possibly the greatest shirt ever featured in a mugshot.


And yes, I'm including Nick Nolte.

Headline Fun

This isn't quite as amusing as the Ed Jew headlines, but when I came to work this morning, there was news that Harry You had been fired as CEO of a company called BearingPoint.

Some of the headlines:
BearingPoint Names Harbach To Succeed You as CEO

BearingPoint Replaces You as Chief, Promotes Harbach

These headlines reminded me of the choose-your-own-adventure books I used to read: "You find yourself in a swamp facing an anaconda!"

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Seeing Double

While in Savannah, I admired the Talmadge Memorial Bridge, which crosses the Savannah River, connecting the city with South Carolina. (Pictured below.)


Hmm, I thought, this bridge looks awfully familiar. You see, in September, I was in Boston, admiring the Zakim Bunker Hill Bridge, which is similar. (See for yourself, below.)


Well, now that I'm seeing them side-by-side, I guess the Boston bridge towers stick up a little more, so that's different. But the look of the cables is pretty much the same. Anyway, I did some Wikipedia research and, sorry Boston, but this bridge design is pretty much Savannah's beeyotch. Because the Talmadge Bridge was built in 1990, while the Zakim Bridge didn't open until 2003.

Interestingly enough, the new Yae Bridge, I mean, Bay Bridge, also has a similar look. It only has one tower, making it seem lamer by comparison. However, the bridge is far bigger than anything in Boston or Savannah. (The eastern span of the Bay Bridge alone is 10 times longer than the entire Talmadge Bridge.) So take that.

Back from the Peach State

Hello readers, I have returned from my journey to the South. It was a longer trip than usual. After spending Thanksgiving in Atlanta, we stayed for a couple of days in Georgia's first city: Savannah.

First of all — item: Georgia is a big state. It took almost five hours to get from Atlanta to Savannah. Who knew? (However, we did stop midway at a Cracker Barrel. Natch.)

In Savannah, we stayed at a delightful bed and breakfast called the President's Quarters. Each room was named after a president that had visited Savannah. (Ours was the Grover Cleveland room.) Partway through the stay, though, I became troubled. I began to suspect that, this being the South, the hotel had a Pres. Jefferson Davis room. I steeled myself to become enormously offended at the inn's attempt to honor Savannah's Confederate past.

My suspicions led to this confrontation with the front-desk lady:
Me: So, how many presidents did you name rooms after?
Lady: Well, there are 16 rooms. So 16 presidents.
Me: Aha, is one of them Jefferson Davis?
Lady: No, they're just named after presidents.
Me: Well, sure, but Jefferson Davis *was* a president. He was the president of the confederacy. And he probably visited Savannah, so um, you would think maybe he'd had a room named for him.
Lady: Nope.
Me: Yeah, well, okay, good.

Shoot — so while I meant to get all offended, instead, I came off looking like some weird Confederacy-loving nut job!

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Off to Atlanta

I'll be back next week. Please direct all complaints to the BuboBlog Enterprises Ltd. corporate office, now a subsidiary of the Sheinhardt Wig Company.

A Thanksgiving Trend?

Well, this is weird. We have three different sets of friends, each of which is opting to spend Thanksgiving in Mexico this year. How did everyone arrive at this idea independently of one another?

And more importantly, who spends Thanksgiving in Mexico? I ask these people: Why do you hate freedom so much?

As for me, I'm going to the birthplace of Thanksgiving: Atlanta [let me do a Wikipedia check on that. -ed.].

Well, it's at least the birthplace of putting marshmallow topping on sweet potatoes, I'll bet.

To get pumped up for eating large quantities of Southern cooking, I've been listening to this clip.

Escalating Tensions

After last week's shooting death of a man who moved too slowly down an escalator, I figured people would be extra courteous this week with their escalator etiquette (i.e., standing on the right, walking on the left).

Well, at least one guy must have missed the news. I was coming into Montgomery station tonight (this is usually a very good subway station in terms of escalator etiquette -- it has a lot of important bidnessmen who are in a hurry) and some guy blocked the left side of the escalator as he jibber-jabbered with his friend about how he prefers to fly Continental but he'll sometimes fly United because they have an arrangement with Singapore Air.

It was rush hour, so the escalator started to get backed up. Finally someone behind me shouted, "Stand right, walk left!" The guy turns around and says to everyone behind him, "Relax. You'll get there when you get there," and then turns back to his companion to continue his conversation.

What an outrage! I mean, while it was technically true that everyone would "get there when they got there," I could hear the whoosh of a Bart train coming down below and everyone risked missing it. (I was actually taking a Muni train, so I was more of an impartial observer.)

When the guy finally got off the escalator, after making no effort to move to the right or walk, I was pretty sure someone was going to shoot him. Fortunately (??), people were too busy running past him to get to their trains.

Monday, November 12, 2007

Bombdizzle Alert!

How awesome is this: Apparently they're going to have solar-powered ferries in San Francisco Bay. (Thanks to BuboBlog correspondent Guy for tipping me off to this.) The big sail shown in the picture functions as a solar panel *and* uses the power of the wind to propel the ferry. Using wind to move a ship, that's INSANE.



I feel like there's a gay joke to be made involving a sun-powered ferry/fairy, but it's probably above my pay grade.

Pimp My Condo

A while back someone on our street altered a real-estate sign to say that the property was "For Sale. Offered by RICH F*CKS FOR RICH F*CKS ONLY" (except, they didn't use asterisks).

Well, the trend continues. This time, someone is having fun with a new condo development called "Park Terrace." I would say the name change is a big improvement!

What Is It You Want From Me?

Someone broke into my car by smashing a window — sometime between Tuesday night and Saturday morning (I should probably check on my car more often). The funny thing is what they stole: nothing.

They rifled through my things and apparently determined that classical CDs, back issues of the New Yorker and a VHS copy of the movie "Metropolitan" were not worth taking.

I thought maybe they broke in so they could sleep in the car (not unheard-of in our neighborhood), but there was no telltale smell of B.O., urine or smoke.

So basically I got a big diss from the car-burgling community: my stuff is WORTHLESS.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

More 'Fissure' Info

"Fissure" is going to have a screening in Dallas on Nov. 15 at the Inwood Theater. Unfortunately, I won't be able to go. But if anyone's in the area, check it out (I know that Dallas is a hotbed of BuboBlog readers).

After that, the movie will go on the festival circuit. The director is aiming pretty high, entering it in all the big festivals (Sundance, Cannes, etc.). They're also taking the film to the American Film Market conference this week to find a distributor. The goal is to get it to a theater near you.

With this kind of movie, though, I would say the best-case scenario is that it gets on Netflix someday. I mean, it's a low-budget picture and doesn't really have the avant-guard qualities that would win over the art-house crowd. I'm hoping it at least makes it into a cool film festival (like Santa Barbara), so I can have a reason to go.

There's also a new trailer on the "Fissure" Web site.

Monday, November 05, 2007

Stevenson in the News

The Chron did a Q&A with Alison Eastwood (who went to my high school) about directing her first film ("Rails and Ties"). The interviewer gives a brief shoutout to RLS (now better known as the Stevenson School) and Alison makes some comment about how going to school in Carmel/Monterey kept her grounded vs. being in L.A. Hmm...OK.
Q: You grew up around Monterey and Carmel and went to the Stevenson School. Do you still live in that area?
A: I live in L.A. now. (The Carmel area) is really beautiful, but I don't go home that often anymore. But I'm lucky that I got to grow up in a place like that. You look at all these kids who grow up in L.A., stars' kids and little actor people, and they're just such a mess. They're all completely spun out and in rehab. I was very lucky. My parents didn't want that kind of life for us. I just had a charmed existence.

I have to say, we saw the trailer for "Rails and Ties" a couple weeks ago. I didn't know until it was over that it was her film, but it looked ultra-hokey and, um, bad. The Rotten Tomato rating would appear to corroborate this impression (35% of reviews are favorable).

Oh well...

Friday, November 02, 2007

'Fissure' Movie Poster

So the official "Fissure" movie poster is now up on the IMDB page. It looks pretty cool. If you look real closely, you can see my name on the bottom line.

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

I'm Feelin' It

I was working late tonight, which meant I was 35 floors up when this earthquake hit. It wasn't the strongest quake I've ever felt, of course, but I don't think I've ever been that high up during a temblor before. The building felt sturdy and safe, but it kept swaying for a while after the quake had stopped.

It also presented the distinct possibility that I would scream like a little girl in front of my co-workers. Fortunately, I stayed cool.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Hmm...

I thought about getting this book, but $10 seems pretty steep.

Top o' the Morning

Speaking of nighttime neighborhood happenings, the following night (Saturday), the warehouse across the street threw a rave party. Now, the last time these guys threw a rave, it lasted until after 8 the next morning (Kelly also called the police that time).

Having a party last until 8 was pretty impressive. For perspective, let's recall what Snoop Dogg once boasted of in 1993's "Gin & Juice":
Two in the mornin' and the party's still jumpin'
'Cause my momma ain't home.
I got bitches in the living room gettin' it on
And they ain't leavin' 'til 6 in the mornin'.

For years, 6 o'clock was the gold standard -- the ultimate length of time for bitches to remain in your living room. Then of course, times changed. It was Jermaine Dupri and Ludacris who raised the bar in 2001 with "Welcome to Atlanta":
Welcome to Atlanta where the playas play
And we ride on them things like every day
Big beats, hit streets, see gangsta's roamin'
And parties don’t stop 'til 8 in the mornin'

When that song came out, I remember thinking, "Now that's just silly. How can anyone party until 8 a.m.? I mean, maybe if we're including the part where I go to a diner and eat some hash browns."

Well, hold on to your hats, because the party on Saturday night/Sunday morning lasted until after 10 in the morning.

That makes me wonder (a) how do the kids of today have so much energy? (b) when is someone going to honor the hard-partying ways of Langton Street in song?

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Warning: Don't Siphon Gas in Our Hood!

Last night (or I guess I should say this morning) around 4 a.m., Kelly was awoken by a commotion outside our window (I was awoken by a commotion *inside* our window -- that being Kelly calling the police).

It seems three shirtless men were crouched by a car, trying to siphon out gas. One of them had a backpack with a tube or something.

Has gas really gotten that expensive that this is something people need to be doing? Especially at 4 a.m., without shirts on. I suspect alcohol and/or barbiturates may have played a role.

Anyway, let's just say the SFPD responded with EXTREME force. Even while Kelly was still on the phone, a bunch of policemen appeared -- seemingly out of nowhere. One of them had a shotgun leveled at the men and was shouting a lot of antagonistic language. Something along the lines of: "GET ON THE FUCKING GROUND OR I SWEAR I WILL BLOW YOUR FUCKING HEAD OFF!"

I was a little shocked. I mean, I know SF's Finest is under a lot of stress, but deploying multiple F-bombs seemed excessive (not to mention the blowing-the-head-off thing).

The police descended on the shirtless men and knocked them to the ground. I thought I saw an officer stomp on one of the men, but I couldn't really tell since they were behind the car.

Listening to the police question the men, it sounded like the cops came on strong because one of the "perps" had his hands in his pockets and looked like he might draw a weapon. Still, had I just witnessed the shirtless-gas-siphoning version of Rodney King here? No matter, I guess, since we don't own a video camera.

One of the suspects complained that his foot or leg was now injured. So then an ambulance arrived to take him away. The police seemed to think he was "walking just fine" and was just fibbing. After a while, everyone else left and silence fell on the neighborhood.

I'm not sure what to make of the whole incident. Living in a crime-friendly neighborhood, I'm usually relieved to see a police presence. And in this case, we were the ones who called them in. Still, I think they could be a little more professional. Especially considering the nature of this crime -- and the suspects' lack of shirts.

You Don't Know Me, Gmail

I use Gmail, which means Google scans my messages and, based on that material, tries to display ads that fit my interest. Most of the time, the ads aren't that interesting and I don't click on them.

Well, yesterday, I was e-mailing with a friend who also uses Gmail and he asked if I was getting the ad that said: "Are You Homeless? CityTeam Cares About You! Food, Clothing, Shelter, and more."

No, I said, I was definitely *not* getting that ad. But I wish I were!!

So I spent the next hour or so sending messages that would prompt Google to send me the ad: writing about how I was thinking about going down to St. Anthony's for some soup, but first I had to sell Street Sheets at the Cable Car turnaround and did anyone have a stick that I could use to carry my bedroll?

That didn't work. Neither did "SHIV, BUM FIGHT, DIRTY NEEDLE, MISSING TEETH" (the caps didn't help either).

I did, however, start getting ads for Kid Rock music.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Alphabet Game

On Sunday, Kelly and I were walking around Hayes Valley and passed the LGBT community center (lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender). I was admiring their fancy sign, and wondered when the next letter will be added. I mean, when I was a young man, people just talked about the BGL (bisexual, gay and lesbian association). Then transgender got a piece of the action.

Anyway, tonight, my question was answered! We were at a neighborhood-planning meeting (yeah, we go to those -- it's very gangsta), and they talked about possibly opening their own LGBTQ center.

Huh, I thought, what's the "Q" stand for? It turns out it means "questioning."

The question now is, in the interest of inclusiveness, how long before heterosexuals get in on this and it becomes "LGBTQH"? I give it six months.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Phugly

Um, wow. Apparently Philadelphia is the least-attractive city in America:
The city of more than 1.5 million people was also found to be among the least stylish, least active, least friendly and least worldly, according to the "America's Favorite Cities" survey by Travel & Leisure magazine and CNN Headline News.

About 60,000 people responded to the online survey -- at www.travelandleisure.com -- which ranked 25 cities in categories including shopping, food, culture, and cityscape, said Amy Farley, senior editor at the magazine.

For unattractiveness, Philadelphia just beat out Washington DC and Dallas/Fort Worth for the bottom spot. Miami and San Diego are home to the most attractive people, the poll found.

Harsh. San Francisco ranked seventh in attractiveness, after Miami, San Diego, Charleston, Austin, Honolulu and Los Angeles (Charleston?). San Francisco did win the overall title in the category "people." I'm not sure what that means, but hopefully they'll use us in any government eugenics experiments.

I'm sure Philly ranked No. 1 in some categories, though, such as being most likely to "squirt Easy Cheese" and "throw batteries at players during sporting events."

What...I kid because I love.

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Haverford in the House

Check this out: Haverford gets a hollatchaboy in this BusinessWeek story. It's about a consultant that helps rich kids get into better colleges than they could by their wits alone.

Kind of funny that they use Haverford as the lead anecdote, since the article is called "I Can Get Your Kid into an Ivy."

The Haverford student sounds like a tool, and I'm kind of surprised he would agree to the interview -- since there's no conceivable way it wouldn't make him seem like a complete putz. But he also paid $18,000 just to figure out how to sound gangsta while going to a Swiss boarding school, so maybe his judgment isn't too sound.

An excerpt:
"As I listened to my 8th period English teacher drone on for the third time about how Finny, a character in A Separate Peace, was indeed the main character although he was not the narrator, it finally dawned on me that this was not the exciting world of high school that I had hoped for."

This is how Andrew Garza began an essay in his application to Haverford College. It was a 1,200-word piece that established him as an intellectually curious young man. It was crafted to appeal specifically to the admissions officers at the small liberal arts school. And it was the idea of his high-priced college admissions coach, Michele A. Hernandez. Garza attended a private school in Switzerland, and that worried Hernandez: She thought he might appear to be a privileged teenager without much substance. So she advised him to write about why he had left his public high school in suburban New Jersey. "We had to make it seem like he didn't want to be around so many rich kids. We spun a whole story about him taking the initiative to leave in order to broaden his experience," Hernandez says. "It was his initiative. But he wouldn't have written about it."

Today Andrew is a senior at Haverford, studying sociology and economics. His father, John, paid Hernandez $18,000 for 18 months' worth of advice. "It is a lot of money," says Garza, a manager at Abitibi-Consolidated (ABY ) in New York. "But if you look at it as an investment, it's not a bad one."

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

I Have No Friends Part 2

Well, this is just getting ridiculous. According to Kelly, my mom now has a Facebook account. I think she and Kelly have become "friends."

Let me know when it becomes cool to *not* have a Facebook account. Because I'm all over that trend.

UPDATE: Wait a moment, I've discovered an alternative to Facebook called "MySpace." I'll get ahead of the curve by trying that.

Hello Neighbor

Amid all the coverage of Al Gore winning the Nobel Peace Prize, I learned that he lives in a South of Market condo (at least part of the time). That's where he was when he found out he won.

I wish I had known this sooner -- we could have been partying together or something. Of course, to be fair, he lives in the St. Regis on 3rd Street, in the nice part of SoMa. I haven't seen the ol' motorcade venturing down to 7th.

I actually met Al Gore once, and it's testament to my looky-lou mastery. I was walking through Cambridge, Mass., and noticed a crowd had gathered. I decided they must be there for a reason and so I too joined the crowd. After five or 10 minutes, I was too embarrassed to ask anyone why we were all just standing there. But then all of a sudden, Al Gore comes out of a building and shakes everyone's hand.

So the next time there's a crowd forming in SoMa, stop awhile. You might just see Al Gore. Or possibly the crowd is just watching two homeless guys shiv each other.

Huh

I was coming home today and saw a poster for "Saw 4."

Can that be right — I'm still trying to see "Saw 1." It's been on our NetFlix queue for forever and never seems to move up on the list. (I wonder if Kelly has something to do with this.) Anyway, apparently I have a lot of catching up to do!

Friday, October 12, 2007

You Gotta Love It

From tonight's mayoral debate in San Francisco:
"How do you plan to address the issue of homelessness in the city, in particular, the issue of aggressive panhandling?"
One challenger, a homeless cab driver who lives in his taxi, offered his solution: "I Grasshopper Alec Kaplan propose to deal with aggressive panhandling by encouraging people to just chill out," he said. "One way that we can do this is by total legalization of marijuana."
George Davis, a self-described nudist activist, offered his suggestion for curbing violence in city: "Can you imagine being very angry but (being able) ... to go to Golden Gate Park on a sunny day and have the option of wearing clothes or not."

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Play That Funky Music

Tonight Kelly and I went to some corporate party where they offered DJ lessons. I went up there and did a little scratching myself, as you can see from this picture:


Apparently the Smithsonian has requisitioned this photograph for an exhibit called "Whitest DJ in the History of Mankind."

Kelly (below) tried it too. For some reason the DJ set up her record so that it would repeat the word "bitch" every time she scratched. (True story.)


I also snapped this picture of Kelly, since I'm both a master DJ and photographer. Now I need to develop a third skill, such as horticulture.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Who's the Densest?

I'm fond of telling people that San Francisco is the most densely populated city in the United States after New York.

Well, it's not exactly true. There are a few smaller cities (bordering larger ones) that are denser — Guttenberg, N.J., Somerville, Mass., West Hollywood, etc. I learned all this on a cool Wikipedia page listing cities by population density. Check it out.

It is fair to say that Ess Eff is No. 2 after New York among large cities in density. So I'm going to keep feeding people the same line. Don't try and stop me.

It's interesting to look at how crazy-dense Paris is. People around here are always whining about how we need more open space. I say we need less open space — someone will just use it to defecate on the grass. And look at Paris (pictured below). Aside from a few areas, they hardly have any open space, and people love it! Maybe I will start attending city planning meetings demanding that San Francisco be more like Paris and then when I lure people to my side, I'll reveal the truth by showing them this Wikipedia page. Bwahahahaha.

I Have No Friends

I thought the fact that I have a Blog meant I was keeping on top of the latest cutting-edge technology. But wait, I learned recently that Kelly has a Facebook account. I don't have a Facebook account. And apparently she has "friends" and they send zombies to bite her and such. What the hoo?

Monday, October 08, 2007

Not-so-Fun Run

Scary about all the runners who collapsed at the Chicago marathon this weekend — including one guy who basically dropped dead. He wasn't much older than me either. I guess it was really hot and all, but still.

I ran the Bridge-to-Bridge race a week ago, and I too had some health issues, which thankfully were less life threatening: nipple chafing. For a long time I've had to suffer in silence about this debilitating ailment. But fortunately, an episode of "The Office" brought the problem into the light two weeks ago.

America, I will no longer be ashamed!

Old-Woman Sunglasses Rock!

My mom started wearing those oversized sunglasses that cover your regular glasses. You know, the ones that are popular among old people and possibly Kim Jong Il.

Anyway, I think we may have made fun of her.

Boy do I feel stupid now, because apparently those glasses are the rage in Hollywood. Or, at least, Hilary Duff is wearing them. Check it out.

Sunday, September 30, 2007

Latest Chuman News

Check out this story, courtesy of BuboBlog Correspondent Bill. It asks the question: "Would you be willing to be one-half chimpanzee to avoid disease?"

Um, heck yeah. I would be one-half chimpanzee just for kicks!

Thursday, September 27, 2007

'Bionic Woman'

Did anyone watch the premiere of the new "Bionic Woman" show? We saw it last night and thought it was OK -- maybe a little hokey in parts. It at least was nice to see some of the cast members of "Battlestar Galactica" show up.

But, what the hey: It's supposed to be set in San Francisco. This has to be the most half-assed job of trying to portray San Francisco I've ever seen. Usually shows at least shoot a few exteriors before heading up to Canada for the rest. With "Bionic Woman," nothing looked like any San Francisco I know: the trees, the buildings, the buses (definitely not Muni's!).

Hopefully the other new San Francisco-based sci-fi show: "Journeyman" will do a better job.

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Trani Shack

On the way to Maine we stopped in Boston and stayed a couple days with friends. Our last night there we were taken to a place called Trani.

Now, I was a bit confused at first when our friend said he was taking us to a place called Trani's. Mainly because I thought he was saying "trannies" and figured he was talking about these. We have lots of those in San Francisco, so I didn't see the need of going to Boston to get it!

Anyway, it turns out Trani is some dessert place with an Italian name — it's in Boston's North End, which is their version of North Beach (clearly a knockoff), i.e., Little Italy.

And hello, Trani is awesome. Their whole deal is they take a cupcake or a brownie or a cannoli, and then they inject soft-serve ice cream into the middle of it. Like, all up in its business.

And then — wait for it — they pour some kind of Magic Shell-like substance all over that shiznit. Awesome!

So now I'm counting the days until we can get some Trani's in San Francisco. I never thought I would utter that sentence!

UPDATE: Apparently this place is now closed. Go figure!

Monday, September 24, 2007

I'm Back

Doesn't look like too much happened while I was gone. Ed Jew is still in office somehow, so the potentially offensive headlines continue: "Newsom Calls on Jew to Resign."

Apparently there was a shooting death just four blocks from our place. That's scary, but I take solace in the extreme incompetence of the murderer.

Apparently he used this as his getaway car (a limo painted as a racecar):


Yeah, so...they caught the guy.

Friday, September 14, 2007

On Break

Loyal readers: I'll be taking advantage of BuboBlog's generous vacation policies by going on a trip to Maine for the next week.

Catch you later in the month!

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

BuboBlog Apologizes

It's been determined that recent blog entries were too risque and not the kind of family-friendly material normally produced by BuboBlog Enterprises LLC (soon to be a subsidiary of News Corp.).

In reparation, a picture of a baby seal:

Tower Envy

This week a panel of judges chose the design for the new tower atop the Transbay Terminal. The structure is supposed to be as tall as the Empire State Building, so it's a pretty big deal for San Francisco.

I'm embarrassed to admit that the one they chose was my favorite. I say embarrassed because critics are calling the choice "predictable," "boring" and "conservative."

Apparently the "cool" choice was this one from Skidmore Owings & Merrill.

Yesterday I heard an additional criticism of the chosen design: that it looks like an "uncircumcised penis."

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Beard Fever Is Back!!

I may have prematurely declared the end of beard fever. Not because I've regrown my beard (though I probably should do that), but because a Yae Area man won the World Beard and Mustache Championships in Brighton, England, on Saturday.

As you can see from the photo, wow. That's something. And the guy is only 23.

I have been shamed.

Tha Block Is Hot

You may have seen a story recently about how San Jose is the richest city in the U.S. This confused me because, why would a rich person agree to live in San Jose? (Or a poor person for that matter.)

Well, a new study gets even more specific and determines the richest city blocks in the U.S. (I thought the article was going to rank the blocks, but actually they just list one block for each major city.)

For Ess Eff, the richest block is:
...where Broadway runs into the Presidio, between Vallejo, Lyon and Broderick. The role call [sic] of residents that includes Gordon Getty, Larry Ellison and Peter Sperlings. Care to buy in? 2845 Broadway is listed for $65 million and 2901 Broadway asks $55 million.

I wonder how our block fared. I mean, I see plenty of people in our neighborhood paying for groceries with $100 bills. And they seem to have a lot of leisure time. I'm sure we were a close second.

Monday, September 03, 2007

To Jollibee or not to Jollibee

Is anyone else confused by the Jollibee restaurant on 4th and Howard?

The Jollibee restaurant chain (basically, the Filipino equivalent of McDonalds) first expanded into the Bay Area in the 1990s, opening a location in Daly City. The Daly City location was super-popular, so they opened another outlet in San Francisco at 4th and Howard.

I don't think it did very well because then it closed. The spot became a Cha-Am Express. As far as I could tell, the Cha-Am did better business.

But now, lo, the Cha-Am is closed. And the Jollibee is going to reopen -- in the same spot. What the F?

By the way, I like this comment on the Jollibee Web site:
Jollibee is on all parts of the world. There is a Jollibee store ready to serve you wherever you are.

Well, there you go.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

More Musings on New York

1. For a city with so many pedestrians, New York really needs countdown crosswalk signals. It's funny how accustomed I've grown to the ones in California. To not have them feels uncivilized. Maybe the mayor can focus on this after he's done attacking transfat.

2. The price of a movie in Manhattan is $11, versus $10.50 in San Francisco. Outrageous!

Monday, August 20, 2007

Leona Helmsley + Parkmerced

I've been hoping amid all these Leona Helmsley obits that someone would mention that she owned Parkmerced (my old apartment complex).

Thank you to SFist for finally coming through! (and to BuboBlog Enterprises consultant Anh-Minh for pointing it out to me.)

The Price of M&Ms in New York

I'm in New York again, this time for work.

They have me at the Recency Hotel on Park Avenue, which is pretty swanky. To wit, there's a television in the bathroom.

I also discovered a container of M&Ms in the "courtesy" bar. If I break the seal on these puppies, it will cost me — I kid you not — $29.

Beard Fever Ends

Well, I shaved my beard. I guess I wanted to get out while the getting was good.

Now I can usher in...Non-Beard Fever!

Thursday, August 09, 2007

Beard Fever...Catch It!

I'm not sure if anyone still watches "The Bachelor," but the latest bachelor is sporting a beard. They even call him the "McSteamy" bachelor. (I won't point out that he doesn't even have the classic McSteamy beard.)

At least it's good to know that the ideal man is bearded and 34. Hells yeah.*




(*Apparently it's not cool to say "hells yeah" anymore, but I feel like I never got to use it on the blog, so this will be my first and last time.)

I Walk the Dinosaur

Say, have you tried this new Walk Score feature? You can plug in any address and it tells you how "walkable" the neighborhood is (like how many restaurants, bars, schools, etc. are within walking distance). It provides hours of fun (well, at least minutes of fun).

I plugged in my home address and got a score of 91 out of 100. Not too shabby. That means it's a "Walkers' Paradise: Most errands can be accomplished on foot and many people get by without owning a car."

I plugged in my work address (345 California) and it rated 98! But I'm not sure that score should apply after dark, since a lot of places close early in the financial district.

My parents' house in Santa Cruz gets an 80: "Very Walkable: It's possible to get by without owning a car."

My old address in Parkmerced gets a lowly 46: "Not Walkable: Only a few destinations are within easy walking range. For most errands, driving or public transportation is a must."

Finally, I tried plugging in the address from when I lived in the woods of Whately, Mass. Its Walk Score? Zero!! "Driving Only: Virtually no neighborhood destinations within walking range. You can walk from your house to your car!"

Ah, snap!

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Wow

Now I feel guilty for criticizing New York's weather. Apparently a tornado hit Brooklyn today.